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Prehistoric Christmas Long-Sleeve Unisex T-Shirt

Size: Unisex S

Shipping and taxes calculated at checkout. Free U.S. shipping on orders over $200.


The origins of many holiday traditions are ancient pagan practices that preceded the Christian era. We believe that several, like the decorating of trees and overeating, started in the Jurassic period. So deck the halls, then don yourself in gay apparel that celebrates the timeless tradition of ugly holiday sweaters.

Printed on Bella+Canvas lightweight forest green heather t-shirt (52% Airlume combed and ringspun cotton, 48% polyester).

Sizes & More Info

The design is printed using a vintage screen printing style which means the graphic will be lightweight and slightly transparent. The ink will sit proudly on top of the fabric but still has a fairly soft hand.

Screenprinted in Pittsburgh, PA, by Commonwealth Press.
Designed by Don Moyer.

  • Turn it inside out.
  • Machine wash in warm water with garments of similar color.
  • Use only non-chlorine bleach, if needed.
  • Tumble dry low.
  • If you plan to wear it to a job interview or wedding, iron on medium setting.
  • Avoid ironing the graphics.
  • Do not dry clean. Use the money you save for a giant coffee.


For more information about our apparel, check out our FAQs.

Shipping & Returns

Shipping Information:

We offer a variety of different shipping options so you can choose what works best for your order. Cost and delivery times will be calculated at checkout. All shipping times are estimates and are not guaranteed. We offer free U.S. shipping on orders over $200 (automatically applied at checkout, we pick the shipping method).


Shipping & Return Policies:

Click here to find shipping and return policies. Questions? Email us at

Where it's made

These garments are lovingly silkscreened by the folks at Commonwealth Press, an artist-run shop located in our hometown of Pittsburgh. They’re darned good at what they do, have mastered all the application techniques we require, and they treat their customers and employees right.

Who we are

Calamityware is a small, eight-person, one-dog company headquartered in Pittsburgh. We love bringing the darkly whimsical view of our founder and chief monster-maker, Don Moyer, to life. Our products are high quality, meticulously manufactured items that make wonderful gifts for you and other weird-adjacent people in your life. Our goal is to make you smile.

Customer Reviews

Based on 22 reviews
Soft and stylish

So glad I bought this shirt. It’s 2020, the world is insane, and I’m wearing a holiday shirt before Thanksgiving. I need joy in my life, and for the love of Clark, the dinos and Christmas tree give it to me. I wish there kitchen towels in this pattern.

A really fun shirt to wear.

The arms are a little long, but maybe that's appropriate for a shirt that features creatures whose arms are a little short. Maybe that evens things out. Soft, stretchy, and fun.

Perfect fit

This shirt is so comfortable, and the fit is perfect for me. Woman, 5’4”, 140 lbs with slightly chubby upper arms. I usually wear S or M in shirts, but sometimes size S is too tight in the upper arms. This shirt fits me exactly right. This is thinner than a standard long-sleeve t-shirt, which I think makes it even more comfortable. The artwork looks great.


Love this holiday shirt! I’m sure I’ll wear it year round!

Nat C.
I want more !

I wish I had bought more of these at the time.
Now it’s sold out ☹️

Mary A.P.
Wonderful shirts

I bought several of these shirts as gifts for my husband, each of my three sons, my daughter-in-law, and one son's girlfriend. The shirts were intended as pre-Christmas presents and were received with joy by everyone. I couldn't buy one for myself because, sadly, I am too large, and I couldn't buy them for my grandkids because, even sadder, the kids are too small. If I might make a suggestion, this would be an excellent design for kids. Anyway, the shirts are well-made, soft, and everyone on my list can't wait to wear them.

Super comfy!

I love how soft the material for this shirt is; the sizing is accurate, as well. The first time I wore it, I got compliments from a couple of my high school students - you know how shocking it is for a teenager to compliment a teacher...yeah, it is THAT cool!

Daddy's old friends

my father's birthday in 12/21.He made 2 mistakes 1. bragging that no one had gotten him any X-mas related item for his b-day in yrs. 2. spinning a yarn about Valasa(?) raptors eating all of Aunt Dot's divinity & he & his cousins getting the blame & having to shovel the sidewalks(cause we all know the great ice age was mainly located in Muncie, IN) Thank you for providing quality vengeance. He was given it early & is planning to wear it on Thanxgiving,

Bobo D.
Very comfortable!

I love the quality of this shirt. It's just right for wearing under my Christmas vest. HO,HO, HO!

Grinch approved

Husband, that normally prefers to ignore the xmas holiday, just loves it!