Your cart
Close Alternative Icon

Five Favorite Apps

Arrow Thin Left Icon Arrow Thin Right Icon
Five Favorite Apps

 

If you aren’t already using these useful apps to enhance your life, what are you waiting for?

Yet?Icon

1 Get the day started right with YET?


I use this app each morning. It uses facial-recognition software and sophisticated algorithms to verify that one is still alive. To save time, I use it to check myself out before I go to the trouble of getting out of bed. So far, it hasn’t been wrong even once.

 MatchIcon

2 Put your best foot forward with MATCH.

This app is a great way to ensure that you look your best before venturing out in public. It uses your phone’s camera to capture an image of your lower extremities and alert you if your shoes or socks don’t match. Simple but effective.

 FlyNowIcon

3 Streamline travel arrangements with FLY NOW.

Just select an exotic destination from the menu and type in the number of gorgeous, international super models in today’s entourage, and the app dispatches a jet of exactly the right size from your fleet. There’s also a version for yachts, but I haven’t tried it yet.

 TadaIcon

4 Make more memorable entrance with TA DA.

TA DA is an app that plays my theme song every time I enter a room. Simple but effective way to add gravitas and a dash of drama without the bother of being followed everywhere by my court musicians.

 HITicon

5 Eliminate distractions efficiently with HIT.

HIT allows you to post an assignment and get hooked up with qualified ninja, fixer, or goon fast. Perfect for occasions when you’re too busy to throw a pie in a victim’s face yourself or when you can’t be bothered to get scary taxidermy or other props on your own. The app gives you a discount if you can provide each victim’s work or home address.

 

These are my current favorites. The world is full of unusual, utilitarian apps. Is there one you find indispensable?

Don
Pittsburgh, March 21, 2019

Comments on this post (8)

  • Jun 30, 2019

    I just ADORE your stuff. I wish i could talk my husband into getting yet another set of dishes, yours, then I could smile every time I set the table. I have your mugs that I have shared with my two siblings who also have that “life is absurd” attitude so make the most of it. Enjoy your blogs, too

    — Molly

  • Mar 23, 2019

    My fav app is, “Oh, sorry…” for Outlook.
    “Oh, Sorry…” detects when designated co-workers or bosses use Scheduling Assistant to probe my availability for a meeting.
    If that time slot is currently open, “Oh, Sorry…” instantly shows it as BUSY.

    If it’s important they’ll call or email, asking for my availability instead of carpet bombing my calendar. Come on, people!

    — Claudette Dorsey

  • Mar 23, 2019

    My favorite go to app is Dopplganger Time machine. You activate it the day before you turn it on and your double goes two days into the future to do all those things you were going to forget about. Also takes care of those tedious tasks you really don’t feel like doing.

    — Hiram Wells

  • Mar 22, 2019

    I NEED the Ta-Da app. Like yesterday. 😀

    — Jean

  • Mar 22, 2019

    My go to app, especially when I’d rather knock off work early, is called DONE! With one click, that tedious project I’ve been putting off is instantly complete and grilled to perfection. The rest of my day is free and I get to literally do nothing and enjoy that comforting but rare feeling of boredom!

    — John

  • Mar 22, 2019

    I really needed that YET app this mor…. x

    — Susan T

  • Mar 22, 2019

    Now I’m wishing my phone apps looked like your drawings!

    — Virginia

  • Mar 22, 2019

    Teaser alert! I thought the ‘Strawberry Thieves’ app would be at the very top of the list; darned to see it didn’t even make top 5. I motion for a revote. BPR

    — BPR

Leave a comment

Recent posts